by Douglas Beckstein

Waiting for an appointment
Waiting for a parking space
Waiting for an elevator

Sitting in a waiting room
Signing another medical form
Looking for my health insurance card
Glancing at magazines that have nothing to do with my life

Waiting to see the doctor
Waiting for the diagnosis
Wondering, is this test accurate?
Looking at numbers on a page
Wanting to understand

Lying on my back for a CAT Scan
Trying to be brave
Asking for a second opinion

Crying inside quietly
Wanting you to make it better
Worrying about dying

Waiting for a cure
Wanting something sweet
Waiting for a blood test
Wanting to run away

Waiting for a prescription
Cursing side effects
Looking for solutions
Wishing my life were different
Wondering how long will I live?

Praying to God
Talking with friends
Telling my story

Waiting for recovery
Wanting to move on

© Douglas Beckstein 2009

Bio of Douglas Beckstein

“I learned that I had colon cancer from a routine colonoscopy recommended by my doctor. Treatment was surgery, chemotherapy and radiation. Diagnosis was October 2003. A surgeon performed an abdominal resection and removed half of my colon one month later. Out of 25 lymph nodes that were removed outside the colon, one lymph node was malignant. My Oncologist decided that my colon cancer was staged at level 3. I required six months of chemotherapy and radiation. All medical treatment was complete by June 1, 2004. I am now five years with no evidence of disease.”